Wierd Start

Its kind of interesting when i see other people and think, wish I could be like them. I guess this thought comes to every mediocre person. But every mediocre person is not as confused as me. I have always been confused in my life. just to start with, I used to be confused whether to speak or not. I haven't overcome that confusion yet but its been better as i grew up. I have made many decisions in my life but this confusion still pulls me down somehow. I never know when my life will be credible and according to my decisions. when will I be strong enough to make my own decisions in life. I always listen to others.
Lets see how much I know about me. What am I best at? computers? not really.. I am not a gizmo geek. ya I know some stuff but that is not enough. Ok then, Studies? not at all.. I may be intelligent but always average results. Then Dance? ya may be I am good, but I have seen some “good” dance better than me, not talking about professionals at all.
What else.. cooking? I cook good Indian food but cant do it for living. So in short nothing...
May be I can do something I love doing... Movies. I love movies. But now I can see why..because may be I try to find myself somewhere in the characters. I try to relate myself to the best person in the film, usually the actress. I somehow compare myself with her and see what will happen if a situation like that in the movie comes to me in real life. Its not unusual though. Many people do that. So whats the big deal? That is my problem. I am still in search of that big deal in my life...